Much of it people wouldn’t understand. Not to mention that there is soooo much to list. And I know that with each thing I share tends to be the reason for yet another step backwards away from my kid.

I remember when a Mom in a baby store came up to me and Parker. Her child was about the same size as Parker. But when she asked how old Parker was and I replied, “Almost 3″, and her child was obviously about 18 months………..well, let’s just say that suddenly her ‘there’s gotta be something not quite right with that kid’ light flashed on and she couldn’t get away fast enough.

I’ve have since been known to lie about Parker’s age.

It’s just easier. And I’ve got more important things to tend to. Like fighting with my insurance company and school district to provide the basics for my child.

And sometimes I just think that instead of me always having to explain Parker, that a little bit of unconditional acceptance can go a long way.

Tammy and Parker
http://www.prayingforparker.com
http://www.5minutesforspecialneeds.com

Tammy and Parkers last blog post..Parker’s Momma Wears Army Boots

Any child may be afraid of a dog, and there’s absolutely no reason to explain yourself or your child.

Carries last blog post..Pooh, Golf Carts, and Marriage

When someone asks what’s wrong, it’s not an accusation or a condemnation. It’s a question. Because we don’t know what’s wrong, and we don’t know what we should do.

(BTW, while I do not have a noticeably special needs child, I’m in another category that draws looks and questions — I have 7 kids. I’ve found that the vast majority of people have no malicious intent, and there’s no reason to act as though they do.)

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But this isn’t really about the dog owner, is it? The issue is whether or not we owe the world an explanation about our children and their disabilities.

Truly, we do not OWE people explanations. The human race is wide and varied and if people don’t realize that, then perhaps they should be the ones explaining themselves. My own son is quite young, but has vision issues and cerebral palsy. When the timing is right and a person seems interested, I take the time to explain. Other times, I don’t. I think that sharing and explaining our children is difficult, but I do think that it helps others to understand and hopefully become more empathetic. Do I always feel like making the world and other people better? Nope. So I compromise and do what feels right for me and my child.

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I haven’t had a chance to use it yet.

Stimeys last blog post..I Don’t Know. I’ve Never Met James.

As a mother of two young kids, I also find myself apologizing profusely for their noisy disruptions in public, so perhaps I am too apologetic all around.

But her comment is rude and ill-intentioned, not one expressing concern for your daughter’s well being. All you owed her was the briefest of answers — though I do agree that “she’s terrified of dogs” would have been more effective, since most people probably won’t get what “she’s on the spectrum” means.

As parents generally, I think we owe people the courtesy of showing that we are concerned about our children’s behaviors and their possible impact on others. So, for example, we show that we genuinely try to calm a screeching child in a restaurant. We owe apologies if our children are truly disrupting or hurting someone else (e.g. in said restaurant), and we owe as much “fixing” of the situation as we can muster. We should take our children away from situations where they are really disrupting others’ enjoyment — but only to the extent that it’s possible. And, frankly, I think pretty much any outdoor venue is fair game for NOT removing a child. We DO NOT, in my opinion, owe people explanations, however. And their rudeness is no reason to think we do. You should say or do only what you feel comfortable saying or doing with/about your daughter to others, and it should be because you WANT to tell them something, not because they are trying to make you feel guilty about your daughter simply being who she is.

MommyTimes last blog post..There Are Times When Only Poetry Will Suffice

I don’t care why children cry or scream. It is not something to be pondered or thought about or analyzed, it is something that needs assistance. A child’s cry demands action. Either by helping or leaving.

Your choice to explain is neither bad nor good. It was a choice in the moment.

The stranger’s choice to let the dog run was neither good nor bad, but her pressing the issue of what was wrong with your daughter made her nosey and kinda rude in my opinion. Even if she had the best of intentions.

I mean, your daughter just IS. She is beautiful, she is loved, she is on the spectrum. None of those are more factual than the others. They just are. Your choice to share facts with others is your business alone and I don’t think you should feel bad either way.

TX Poppets last blog post..Mama Always Said I Was A Little Spacey